Unchain My Heart

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When I sing this song at karaoke it reminds me of a grown man who is unable to walk away from a bad relationship. I don’t know why that would be, but I’ve seen it many times. And the irony of this situation is that if he did walk away, he’d often be in another relationship within a week.

With people living together these days its inevitable that this pattern would occur. My mentor at a pro-life crisis pregnancy center I volunteered at said that “women give sex for love and men give love for sex”. As real as sex seems in our modern culture, it is not an end in itself. Except that it is.

Skipping all the “unnecessary” steps in building a life-long relationship, people end up with a shallow, easy to “terminate and move on” series of relationships. Since sex seems easy to get into in a weeks time these days, we create a culture where children, if not aborted, face a future environment devoid of security. And children often are raised by their peers with a series of adult “parents” in the process.

Now I’ll speak to the issue raised by Barak Obama that the black community suffers because of too many fatherless homes. This is a point that some “conservatives” have criticised Obama for. In the book “In a Perfect World” eight successful men of single mothers are featured. An interesting point is made: “All the men in the film, including the director’s son, adopted loving and supportive men to fill the role of their father. Ms. McWilliams brothers, interviewed at her son’s soccer game, gladly stepped into the father role for their nephew.”

The critics of Obama are the same people who will talk about self-made people who have been very successful. But the question is; can they be self-made if someone goes out of their way to mentor them? One might say that Frederick Douglass was one person who was self-made. But did he learn to read and write, become a speaker in America and overseas, and become a leading abolitionist and confidant to President Lincoln all on his own? – “No”.

There is nothing positive to be said for cohabitation. There is a false narrative that fathers aren’t needed. And I doubt any conservative in Congress has ever stepped up to be a mentor to a child with only a mother.

When are we going to wise up as Christians and challenge the current culture about the consequences of cohabitation? You say you do? The ones in your family? Do you sleep under the same roof?


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